When we think about self-reflection, we often picture it happening from the neck up journaling, thinking, praying, processing. And those things are effective and helpful. What we don’t often think about with self-reflection is how much our bodies carry that information too. Tension in your shoulders and neck that will not release. A heaviness in … Read more
Life has a rhythm. Children grow up and leave. A new baby arrives. A wedding day comes and goes. A child steps off the elementary school bus for the last time and becomes a middle schooler seemingly overnight. These transitions are so ordinary that we can move straight through them without ever pausing to ask: … Read more
Ask most parents and spouses what they wish they had more of, and the answer is almost always time. Time to connect. Being able to breathe and actually being present with the people we love instead of always rushing and on to the next thing. I often work with clients who are dealing with some … Read more
Some people decide to come to counseling because of a specific event or a series of events that have happened to them and that incident has caused something to shift or change their world. Some people come to counseling because they’ve noticed over a period of time, something feels off and in spite of their … Read more
The last time I flew, I noticed that barely anyone was talking on the plane before it took off. I know this ages me some, but when I used to fly, there would be nonstop chatter all around me on the airplane. People making connections with others, even for a few minutes before the plane … Read more
A few weeks ago, my husband came home and all evening he was on and off his phone and computer. At first, I started to get frustrated because I noticed he was distracted and not fully present with spending time with me. But then I stopped and reminded myself that he rarely does this so … Read more
I’ve noticed a trend with parents when I’m out in public, especially when I’m out to dinner. I see parents of all ages, on their phones and not being totally present with their children. Most of the time, the parents are scrolling, and the children, especially children under 1 year old, are babbling and trying … Read more
Every couple misses each other sometimes. Not in the “I miss you when you travel” kind of way, but in the quiet, frustrating, sometimes painful way where you tried to connect and it just didn’t land. These misses are completely normal. But they can make you feel disconnected and discouraged. We wrote a blog found … Read more
We talk a lot about attunement in the context of parenting, but the truth is, it belongs just as much in your marriage. Maybe even more. Sometimes practicing attunement with your spouse can be a little easier than with your children because your spouse can give you more real-time feedback on how you’re doing using … Read more
Somewhere along the way, a message crept into parenting culture that said: the more you sacrifice yourself for your child, the better parent you are. And if you’re struggling to parent, if you’re unsure, if you set a boundary, well, maybe you’re not quite attuned enough and doing something wrong. Or maybe you’ll do something … Read more