Right after Thanksgiving last year, I noticed that I was completely unmotivated to do anything on the weekends. This is unusual for me, as I typically have a long to do list for the weekend: writing the blog and social media posts, spending time with friends and family, cleaning up the house, catching up on things for the business, etc. So, after the second weekend in a row, where I mostly sat and watched TV, I knew something was up. I began to explore what might be happening and I had an “Aha” moment. I was tried. The longer I sat with the feeling of being tired, I realized that I was feeling the pressure of trying to fit more people in during the month of December. Many people don’t realize that being a private practice counselor is seasonal. For example, people realize that landscapers, at least here in the Midwest is a seasonal job, and so is snow plowing. Turns out, counseling is too! Many people get stressed right before the Holidays, and need help identifying coping strategies and good boundaries during the Holidays. Then many people get depressed after Christmas, many people suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder this time of year. I had a number of students who were struggling to complete their classwork before the end of the semester and many new people wanting to start therapy with the anticipation of the winter blues settling in. And, I was left with the feeling that I personally didn’t have the time or energy to add any more hours to my already busy schedule. It’s difficult when you’re in the caring profession because you want to help as many people as you can but you also realize that you need to have space to rest and recover. I care so deeply for people, it’s just sometimes hard to find the balance of caring for others and making yourself a priority.
So, every weekend for about a month or more, I didn’t do a whole lot on the weekends. While my perfectionist self wanted to shout that I was being lazy, and there were tons of things to do, I just rested, refueled and recharged. I didn’t allow my mind to convince me to push through and check off a bunch of things on my to do list. Instead, I told the inner voice, to quiet down, to trust me, and let me rest. And I’m so thankful I did. I came back to the office after Christmas, and felt ready to help and pour into people, and most importantly hold space for them to share difficult things. I tell my clients often, that I feel so honored that they let me walk with them on the hardest parts of their personal stories and what great courage it takes on their part to allow me to do so. I really love the work that I do, and being able to help people find peace, hope and healing!
Since I’ve focused on burnout throughout the month of February, I know recognize my own signs of when I’m heading that direction. And right after Thanksgiving last year, that was where I was headed. So I made sure I did something about it, and I was able to recover quicker and easier than I had in the past.
Here are the things that I did to help me rest and recharge before I burned out:
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I quieted my inner mean voice-you know the one I’m talking about. The one that likes to say you’re being lazy, or you need to just do all the things anyway whether you feel like it or not.
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I said yes only to things (people, activities) I knew would energize me.
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I said no to all the things I knew would drain me.
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I made sure to take my daily vitamins without skipping any days-I normally take Vitamin B, D and Omega 3’s-these are good insulators against depression.
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I made sure to spend time by myself.
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I napped when I felt like I needed it.
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I made sure to do my daily quiet time and journaled
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I significantly limited my time on social media.
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I found some good books to read just for run.
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I put boundaries around work-when I came home in the evening, I didn’t check email, finish notes or return phone calls.
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I made sure I was eating healthy.
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I kept a good bedtime routine-this one is never hard for me!
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I kept my workout routine in place.
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I tried a new hobby-turns out embroidery is not for me since I can’t see without a magnifying glass! 😂
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I tried new recipes.
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I watched some good documentaries.
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I listened to some new podcasts and caught up on some favorites.
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I checked in on a few close friends.
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I scheduled out one day off a month just for myself for all of 2021-this was probably one of the most significant changes I made.
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I significantly lowered my expectations for what I “should” do, to what I “needed” to do. This was probably the most significant change I made.
I’m really finding that more people of all ages are on the verge of burnout, and I’ve said it before, the Pandemic is part of the reason. I also think people are feeling insecurity on many different levels but financial, cultural and government seem to be the big ones right now. As a result, people are feeling tired, anxious, depressed and on the verge of burnout.
I encourage you to take time to reflect on how you feel right now, what you need to feel better and find one thing you can change to help you rest, refuel and recharge. Take the time to create a list of your own, of what you need to feel better, or steal some of mine. I wholeheartedly believe, the world needs YOU, right now, whatever you’re doing and that means you need to take care of yourself right NOW, no one else is going to do it for you. And best of all, YOU can give yourself permission to take care of yourself, no one else needs to give you this permission!
I hope you find the time to rest, refuel and recharge as you finish out this Midwest winter becoming the best version of yourself!
This Spring Lisa is offering a workshop for organizations called: 3 Common Mistakes People Make that Destroy Their Peace of Mind and How to Avoid These Mistakes Once and For All. In this workshop, Lisa will cover, what burn out looks like, how to have good boundaries to protect your sanity, how to complete the stress cycle, how to care for yourself so you can rest and recharge, and tons of take away tools to create an individualized plan to learn to thrive even in a crisis. Lisa is offering this workshop in a 45-minute or 90-minute format, in person or virtual. This workshop can be shortened or lengthened to fit the specific needs of your organization. Email Lisa Franklin at lisa@peacefamilycounseling.com to book your spot now!
As a former Elementary Education teacher, Lisa Franklin, MSW, LCSW, understands the difficulty of managing the demands of caring for others and how it can feel overwhelming at times. Lisa is a licensed clinical social worker and is passionate about helping people go from feeling overwhelmed and shut down to empowered and in control. Lisa is currently in private practice in Greenwood, IN and helps children and individuals restore balance and peace in their lives through individual therapy and parent coaching. You can read more about Lisa and her specific training on her website at: www.peacefamilycounseling.com